I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
third nipple confirmed
i need to put some appletini on your dick
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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