he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize