Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
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