He asked me if I "almost moaned"
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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