Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
