i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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