Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
