butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
