the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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