I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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