If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
