your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Randomize