We're facebook friends in real life
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Randomize
