ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
