My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Randomize
