Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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