You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
