David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I need to stop coming to work sober
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Still dying that you shit outside
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
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