I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
