I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
