Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
