I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
he thought i was a dude.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
