What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
