Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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