He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
