in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Fuck appropriateness.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
