There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize