ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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