he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
