Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
