Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize