now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
