The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
