i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Quick, to the slutcave!
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
