My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
