If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
