So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
