I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Still dying that you shit outside
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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