We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I DEMAND FORESKIN
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
