You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
