dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize