Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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