Bisexual people are plain selfish.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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