just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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