too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
