Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
