you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
