used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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