Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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