Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
